pondering

why do i sometimes get this bug up my butt about wanting to know what's going on with people from my past lives? i've known some rad people and then had to give them up for the good of the situation. there's a reason they're in my past.
i got just such a bug and started "facebooking" them (i can't believe i just used that as a verb) and found some of them. and they're sprogged up. ALL OF THEM. and not just one little sproglet. a TRIBE of sprogs all of them have. it's so weird to think of these people as parents. i really could only imagine one of them as a parent and even the thought of him as a parent was stretching it.

then i start wondering why the thought of a conventionally "normal" life is so weird to me. it makes me think i was put together wrong. rather, it makes me think of baby tomato plants. you know how you're supposed to guide them along a stake in the garden until they get their footing and can wind up the stake on their own? i don't think i was pointed toward the "normal" stake. i don't think i was pointed toward a stake at all, i was just left to see what i could grab onto. i like what i've found, but there are times (VERY few times) where i wonder what my life would be like if i had been pointed toward that "normal" stake. hm.